Loving myself is about paying attention to what works and what doesn’t for me, and doing more of what works and less of what doesn’t, no matter how hard it is.
Loving myself is being present to how I work, how I act, react, and what’s best for me.
Here’s what works for me: (I want to do this every day!)
- morning pages (writing 3 pages on the back of scratch paper by hand, first thing when I wake up)
- yoga as early as possible in the day– daily
- meditating first thing in the morning after getting up
- first thing to eat: green smoothie (greens and fruit, chia seeds, flaxmeal, and more fruit)
- waking up early
- writing as early as possible
- writing out what I’m happy and grateful for every day
- exploring somewhere new as often as possibile
- going to sleep early
- unplugging on weekends and after 4pm
- pausing to be conscious of my breath once in a while
- pausing to appreciate Lyon once in a while
- listening to my body
- doing my best to listen deeply and be present for others
- ginger tea
Here’s what doesn’t work for me: (the stop-doing, let-go, this-is-a-manifestation-of-resistance list)
- checking social media constantly– or much at all
- checking email constantly
- checking RSS reader constantly
- checking my phone constantly
(all of the above: refresh loops –> “insecurity work”)
- chai tea lattes (the mix probably has milk in it(!), and the sugar makes my mouth dry and doesn’t make my body feel too good– yesterday’s discovery)
- gluten-free bread (back to regular wheat bread, please! I’ve tried so hard to like it but I just don’t like the taste)
I’m still discovering and uncovering more every day what works and doesn’t work (especially what doesn’t work, because usually that’s what’s easier to repeat unconsciously!). I have to remind myself, too, of what really makes me feel at my best: giving, loving, grateful– what helps me do my best work.
And I fall into what doesn’t work over and over again, just because it’s– annoyingly enough– way easier to do it most of the time… and way easier to avoid dealing with the unglamorous mess of loving, mindful change.
True love means mindfulness; presence; understanding.
True love is having the gall to pay attention and actually stay with myself in every moment I’m alive– especially when it gets hard, shaky, lonely– because the more self-aware I am, the more I understand myself, and the more I can be considerate to myself and know just how to love myself in a way that makes me feel at my best.
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